Despite Paradise: An Existentialist Play

Despite Paradise

Narrator: A dispute plays out in the most unlikely situation as there are three voices ringing throughout the large white room with which their impassioned arguments can be heard. One voice is youthful, and as such the voice is tinged with a kind of optimism even in the face of such extraordinary circumstances. The other voice is wearisome, the experience of living a life endowed with reason and science, the end result being complete and utter disenchantment even in the face of the most fantastical and wondrous phenomena the human imagination can experience. The third voice is one whose power is accustomed to being lent to help others. Such is the case here, as they hope to effectively mediate the two voices in opposition with one another. All the while a luminous white door looms in their view almost as if it was a silent observer that happened to be privy to the words that boom throughout the room. This place is supposed to be the setting of mankind's innermost yearnings and desires, yet it is a feeling of despair among these three women and their interactions with each other, that sees the strongest persistence. As they are stuck in this room together and they try and make sense of how they got here and the lives they left behind, one is left to wonder if the despair can be dispelled…or if it will continue to drag them into the muck of human misery.
ACT I

Ameera: [wakes up from a long sleep] where am I?
[A Guardian stands over her]
Guardian: Hello, ma'am. Welcome to….
Ameera: I have an idea where I am. But am I stuck here forever?
Guardian: I wouldn't say stuck but I would say forever.
Ameera: Forever sounds unperceivable right now
Guardian: Well you just got here, ma'am.
Ameera: [looks around] Is this room all of "it"?
Guardian: No this is just one of many shared dormitories.
Ameera: Shared? Shared with whom exactly?
[A bright blinding light shines in the room, another bed appears and it is filled with a body]
Ameera: Whoa!
Guardian: [walks over to stand by the new arrival] Hello, ma'am. I am a Guardian. Welcome to…
Crystal: [jumps off the bed and shouts] Yes! Yes! I'm here! I made it! I knew I would!
Ameera: [Ammera looks over at the woman who appeared along with her bed on the right side of the room] you seem overly ecstatic to be here.
Crystal: Well shouldn't I be!? This place is great!
Ameera: My name is Ameera. I am a respected physician. A doctor if you will.
Crystal: You mean you were a doctor. I'm Crystal. And it doesn't matter where I came from as long as I'm here now.
Ameera: Alright, well Crystal, it's nice to meet you.
Crystal: It's nice to meet you too. Do you have a name Mr. Guardian?
Guardian: I won't be here long. Please continue to introduce yourselves before the next one arrives.
Ameera: A third person?
Crystal: [shouts in a spunky manner] Ooh! We'll have another roomy!? Great!
[Another bright light appears along with a bed on the left side of the room from Ameera's perspective the Guardian walks over to stand by the second woman's bed side]
Guardian: Hello, ma'am. Welcome to…
Kaitlyn: [rises up from bed and humbly addresses Guardian] I am truly honored to have the privilege to come here.
Crystal: [looks over to the woman with glee and shouts] Welcome roommate! I'm Crystal!
Ameera: [shrugs a little from Crystal's high pitched voice and retorts to the new woman] Hello. My name is Ameera.
Kaitlyn: And I am Kaitlyn. It's nice to be in the presence of the two of you.
Guardian: [looks over them all one by one and then says] Well now I shall leave you be. Outside you will find a large corridor and beyond that there's another door but then beyond that there's……you should know.
Crystal: [jokingly states] Ooh! I know! The beyond!
Ameera: [looks down and nods her head in shame]
Guardian: Blessed be.
Crystal: Blessed be.
Kaitlyn: Hmm, yes. Blessed be. Indeed.
Ameera: ………………..
[The Guardian leaves the room but does not close the door on the way out]
Ameera: [stares out the door from her bed side and wonders]
Crystal: This room is so……white.
Ameera: What exactly do you mean by that?
Crystal: White walls, white floor, white beds, and even our robes are white.
Ameera: Ah, yes. All white.
Kaitlyn: Well shall we all follow him out the door to see the rest of this place?
Crystal: Ooh! Yes! Yes!
Ameera: Wait a minute!
Kaitlyn: Hmm?
Ameera: Aren't you curious as to why we were all brought here? And why they stuck us together?
Kaitlyn: Not at all.
Crystal: No.
Kaitlyn: Order of entry, perhaps.
Ameera: Maybe, but I still want to know who you all were before you ended up here. If you don't mind me probing that is.
Crystal: I mind!
Ameera: Umm. Okay.
Crystal: Just kidding! Ask away!
Ameera: [snickers at Crystal] Ok I'll start with you Crystal. What were you doing just before you got here?
Crystal: Driving.
Ameera: Oh ok. To where?
Crystal: Someplace. I can't remember.
Ameera: Alright. What about you Kaitlyn?
Kaitlyn: I was also driving.
Ameera: [shockingly asks] Wait, what? You two know each other from before we got here?
Crystal: No! Well, yes! But only for a split second or two! Hehe!
Ameera: Are you saying you two were involved in some kind of accident?
Kaitlyn: Unfortunately.
Ameera: Alright. So you two crashed why aren't you mad at each other?
Crystal: No. Why would I be mad now?
Kaitlyn: No reason to be.
Ameera: It must have been painful to go through that.
Crystal: Nah, it was pretty quick.
Kaitlyn: Practically painless.
Ameera: Luckily for you. I know I shouldn't be asking this from a woman, but what are your ages?
Crystal: Age doesn't matter now, silly!
Kaitlyn: If you must know I recently turned thirty years old.
Crystal: And I was only twenty years old.
Ameera: Wow. You're both so young. I am already in my forties.
Crystal: Like I said, age doesn't matter anymore at least not here.
Ameera: Hmm. I guess you're right.
Crystal: I sure am. So, what happened to you?
Ameera: Me? I'm not quite sure. I remember coming home. To my condo that is. I had a long stressful day at work and decided to lie down. That's all I can recall.
Kaitlyn: Sounds like you went peacefully.
Crystal: Yeah, you were also one of the lucky ones.
Ameera: If you say so. Darn! I should've asked the Guardian as well while he was in here.
Crystal: Why bug him with that? It doesn't matter what happened now, anyway.
Ameera: But it does to me. Did I suffer a myocardial infarction? Was it a brain aneurysm? Or was it a deadly stroke?
Crystal: Who cares!
Kaitlyn: You mustn't concern yourself with those details.
Ameera: [sighs heavily]…..Ahh! I just hate not being certain about it, you know?
Crystal: No, I don't know.
Ameera: [grunts]
Crystal: Just kidding!
Ameera: Fine. I won't bother with it any further. But there's more than just that, that's bugging me.
Crystal: [sighs] Like what? I want to go outside already!
Ameera: Fine, never mind.
Kaitlyn: Hold on Crystal. There should be plenty of time for that. Let's try and put to rest her curiosity.
Ameera: [clears throat]
Kaitlyn: Continue, Ms. Ameera [A puzzled look spreads across Kaitlyn's face as she never got Ameera's last name.]
Ameera: Garcia. My last name is Garcia.
Kaitlyn: We should have no use for family names here.
Crystal: Yeah! We are all united! [skips around the room]
Kaitlyn: I agree but go on.
Ameera: Oh, right. What I'm mostly puzzled about is how does someone like me end up here?
Kaitlyn: You mean someone in your professional field?
Ameera: Yes, I mean no. You know someone who doesn't "believe."
Crystal: [suddenly stops skipping around the room and gasps] Oh!
Kaitlyn: Hmm. That is very interesting. Why were you not a believer?
Ameera: That's a long story. Began as rebellion and ended in logical certainty. I struggled with it my whole life but my point is how did I still end up here? It makes no sense to me.
Crystal: [stomps and shouts] I can't believe you! You non-believer!
Kaitlyn: Crystal, calm down. Perhaps ultimately it was your actions that determined your course to come here. You were a physician after all. Healing others was your duty.
Ameera: Let's say it was my so-called duty. If I wasn't happy performing it I guess it's the only logical explanation that the consequences of my practice outweighed my utility?
Crystal: [crosses her arms and pouts] Logic? There's no use for that here, just saying.
Kaitlyn: I may have to agree with Crystal on that. This place is beyond the grounds of logic. And morality wasn't based on what made you happiest.
Ameera: Wasn't? Why are you talking in past tense? You think moral absolutes don't exist here? And, forgive me but in my profession I had to be very logical, especially when it came down to avoiding conjectures to arrive at a correct diagnosis. That approach is why I never lost a patient.
Kaitlyn: Yes, I think that goes without saying that this place represents our reward for our moral adherence. And I'm well aware that medical malpractice is a killer. Metaphorically speaking that is.
Crystal: [turns her head away from Ameera] Hmm! I guess you are forgiven by Him considering you are here.
Ameera: [jokes at Crystal] Well I am thankful for your forgiveness.
Crystal: You're welcome!
Kaitlyn: Is that the last of your questions, Ameera?
Ameera: Hmm. Not quite. You see, the preponderance of my curiosity of how I ended up here outweighs my curiosity to go out and explore. I need to know the "Why" behind things. Not always, but in this particular instance, I just need to know.
Kaitlyn: But you may never get your answer here. Who's to say anyone gets that answer up here?
Ameera: [frustrated] Ahh! But why can't I? What if this bugs me forever? What then?
Crystal: I think we should go outside without her Kaitlyn
Kaitlyn: No, Crystal. Don't be rude. And Ameera, maybe you should find the Guardian again and ask him that question.
Ameera: But I don't know where he went off to.
Crystal: Ooh! I know where!
Ameera: Where?
Crystal: To the beyond! Ha!
Ameera: [looks at Crystal but doesn't laugh]
Kaitlyn: Then may I suggest you move onto your other dilemmas.
Ameera: But this is a major dilemma. How do they pick and choose who gets to come here? What's the selection process?
Kaitlyn: That is something we may never get to know.
Ameera: But why, not? What if another person materializes here like someone we don't like?
Kaitlyn: Highly unlikely. If they're in this room with us that means their character and personality were judged as virtuous by the Arbiter of this place.
Ameera: That's preposterous. Think of the chances of meeting a former lover or family member who betrayed you.
Crystal: That doesn't matter because I'll still love them!
Kaitlyn: I wasn't speaking of that.
Ameera: Then what were you speaking of?
Kaitlyn: I'm debating meaning with you. When you say you don't like someone that implies that the individual hurt you in the past and there's no indication that they are the person they once were upon entering this place.
Ameera: What if I won't like them?
Kaitlyn: I guess you are still entitled to your preferences.
Crystal: Okay, so how about we get out of this room so we won't have to find out whether or not you like the next person that you see.
Ameera: Hold on. I still can't grasp why I'm here. Think about it. In my line of work, I held Science as my law over other aspects of emotional and intellectual living including religion. Also, I never even stepped foot into a church since I was a teenager. So if my actions got me here wouldn't my inaction to participate in religious services prevent me from coming here?
Crystal: The nerve you got! You don't seem happy to be here at all!
Kaitlyn: Relax, Crystal. But she's right, you seem like you're in despair.
Ameera: Really? Well, darn it I guess I am in despair. Can you blame me?
Kaitlyn: Yes. Need I remind you that you saved lives in your prior existence? Sounds like worthy deeds to me.
Ameera: Yes but I saved all lives. That goes with believers and non-believers alike. Heck, I've even saved criminals lives!
Crystal: [sardonically] Good job!
Kaitlyn: What those men did with their lives after they left your building was out of your control.
Ameera: Right, but it was in my control to save them. I swore by the Hippocratic Oath that I would treat everyone under a stethoscope the same, but I often worried about my consequences for doing so.
Crystal: For saving lives? Duh! You ended up here!
Ameera: It's not that simplistic. Sometimes I inadvertently heal bad people who go on to do really cruel things after they leave my care. Shouldn't I be held responsible in some way for not probing into their psyche to find out if they should've been institutionalized?
Kaitlyn: Not at all. That would have required immense patience and I don't think any hospital had the man power to staff enough psychologists for every single patient.
Ameera: Why not? Let me guess, you are a determinist aren't you? Well I'm not. I believed that we all have free will. That we all were responsible for our choices and we didn't always choose the right choice even if our intentions were good.
Kaitlyn: That is uncontestable. Of course I believe in fate, after all, this place was setup for us. We just had to wait to get here.
Crystal: Yeah and like she said before, it's now out of your human hands.
Ameera: So what I'm supposed to believe that I'm here because I spent most of my time healing others just like what's his face, you know Him?
Kaitlyn: Yes, just like Him. You do know about Him and his writing.
Ameera: Yeah I do I just never took it seriously.
Crystal: Oh! Speaking of Him, I can't wait to see his holiness.
Kaitlyn: In due time we all shall be graced with His presence.
Ameera: Yeah, you see, I'm not so sure I even want to leave this room as of right now.
Crystal: What? Are you insane? Don't you have someone you'd like to reunite with?
Ameera: Not really anxious about that. And even if there is someone, how am I certain they are beyond this door and down the corridor and beyond the other door?
Kaitlyn: I guess you'll have to believe the words of the Guardian.
Ameera: I'm not as sure about that as you two are. I'm surprised you're not getting as annoyed about it as I am.
Kaitlyn: Annoyed with what, Crystal?
Crystal: Me? What did I do?
Ameera: No, not you. I'm talking about this place. I never believed in it for a good reason, at least I thought so.
Kaitlyn: What reason was that?
Ameera: Well this place always sounded improbable to me. Are there even any soldiers here? What about conveniences? What will we do for entertainment? What is permissible for recreation? And can anyone really experience recreation without a form of labor mitigating its necessity in the first place?
Kaitlyn: [sighs] Dasein. Dasein. Dasein.
Crystal: [her eyes roll into her head] Yeah. You are just upset over the fact that your skills are useless here.
Ameera: What are you saying? Is this not the "Realm of Being"?
Kaitlyn: You're obsessed with a different kind of Being. The kind that you used to authenticate yourself from others and it does not apply in this Realm of The Forms. You are still mentally stuck on the Realm of Becoming.
Crystal: Yup. Sorry but your healing days are over. You should be happy you don't have to work anymore.
Ameera: But that's really depressing! Do you know how much time, money, and effort I put into my schooling?
Crystal: Probably a lot.
Ameera: A lot is an understatement. I put my social life aside for it.
Kaitlyn: Are you saying you were never married either?
Ameera: Either? No and I'm assuming you were never married as well.
Kaitlyn: Marriage was not for me.
Crystal: I wanted to but I felt I was still too young. I thought I had plenty of time for it. I guess I was wrong!
Ameera: Speaking of time, how are we keeping track of it here? Does it exist? Is it even used?
Crystal: I don't know.
Kaitlyn: I doubt it. Time was a man-made conception.
Ameera: I disagree with that. And let me tell you why….
Crystal: [sighs heavily] Ugh! We really don't want to hear it.
Ameera: Why not?
Crystal: Because it's a useless debate up here.
Ameera: Not to me it isn't.
Crystal: [sighs heavily]
Ameera: Fine I'll leave that alone. But wouldn't you like to know how you will be spending your time up here? I mean I used to have passions, didn't you as well?
Kaitlyn: Yes.
Crystal: Yup.
Ameera: Okay, so let's say your passion was to repair cars. Do we even need a vehicle up here? What will be of the avid race car driver with dreams of winning the championship cup?
Kaitlyn: Mundane and appetitive.
Crystal: Yeah, talk about being vain.
Ameera: But what if it consumed someone's life? What if it was their joy and passion only to end up here and find it missing? How do you expect to escape absurdity without art or hobbies?
Crystal: What do you mean by absurdity? Nothing about this is ridiculous silly!
Ameera: I am talking about the absurdity of life Crystal, the futility of it in a place like this.
Crystal: What's your point?
Ameera: We are cut off from having a purpose here. Don't you realize how depressing that can be?
Kaitlyn: What we had were temporary passions. I'm sure we all knew well and good that it could all be taken away from us. Death hit us all and won't miss the rest of them left behind.
Ameera: I know that but I'm talking about having ended up here and realizing that what defined you down there is suddenly completely irrelevant up here.
Crystal: What's with this obsession with preserving your past identity? Why do you still feel the need to define yourself? Who's to say He doesn't have a major purpose for us when we finally step out of this room!
Ameera: How else are we distinguished from one another? Let's say He does have a purpose for us. What would be our new duties and how would they know we were right for that task? I doubt there's even a purpose here. A purpose implies a goal. This place is the end not a means to an end.
Kaitlyn: Staying in this room won't get you any of those answers you are looking for.
Crystal: That's for sure.
Ameera: If everyone under the age of a senior was told to respect all seniors then wouldn't we expect some sort of pure cleansing during old age?
Crystal: You are not making any sense right now.
Ameera: All I'm saying is that being old doesn't automatically mean that you are right all the time in the face of youth. And when youth barks back at old, it's seen as disrespect.
Crystal: That's how I was taught.
Kaitlyn: Me too.
Ameera: See what I mean? Taught by whom? Aren't there senior citizens in prison too? Everyone should start with a clean slate of acknowledgement so I'll always lean an ear but I won't respect anyone's ignorance.
Crystal: So the point is, you aren't that excited to see your family, huh?
Ameera: Who's to say they will be the ones less thrilled by my appearance?
Kaitlyn: Remember what I said about resentment? It does not live here. It cannot thrive here.
Ameera: I remember and I certainly hope that is not true.
Kaitlyn: Why not?
Ameera: Resentment is one of the factors that can spur competition. Can there be competition here?
Kaitlyn: Absolutely not.
Crystal: No! Why would you want to compete with anybody?
Ameera: Because competition breeds innovation,
Crystal: Why would we need to innovate anything? It's probably all here for us……well not here but once we leave this forsaken room!
Ameera: That would be a real shame to hinder competition. I couldn't image myself healing others without the thought that there was always someone waiting to take my job.
Kaitlyn: Why?
Ameera: Because I would get complacent and become a mental sloth.
Crystal: You mean to tell me you didn't practice medicine because you cared about people? You only did it to be better than others?
Ameera: I'm not that shallow. But care as a motivator can only last so long.
Crystal: Whatever. You sound crazy.
Ameera: Some days I wouldn't have been able to push myself so far without that motivator.
Kaitlyn: I'm guessing the ends justified the means for you?
Ameera: In my profession that's certainly the case. Shouldn't you try to save a life by any means?
Kaitlyn: Not if it means taking another life.
Ameera: That does not happen in my profession.
Kaitlyn: Don't you sometimes "assist" patients with their disdain of life?
Ameera: You are asking me if I ever assisted someone in suicide.
Kaitlyn: Yes.
Ameera: I never had the opportunity but if I did I probably would have done it.
Crystal: Luckily you didn't because if you did you most certainly would not have ended up here.
Ameera: So you are implying that everyone that took that "path" isn't here?
Crystal: Nope. Not implying. It's got to be true.
Ameera: Well that's a bit premature; we have yet to step out of this room to see the others.
Crystal: No thanks to your mouth moving so much!
Ameera: Speaking of mouth, I mean more so about taste but what will be of our sensory perception?
Kaitlyn: Our eyesight seems intact. There's nothing to whiff or taste at least not yet.
Ameera: Wouldn't our reflective consciousness be affected by our sensory deprivation?
Crystal: Utter nonsense. We are here to reunite with loved ones not try to recreate life on Earth.
Kaitlyn: She's got a point there.
Ameera: Aren't you worried about if you can touch them?
Crystal: Disgusting!
Ameera: Not like that.
Kaitlyn: You're still holding onto earthly propositions in this otherworld.
Ameera: How can we ever hope to formulate propositions in the same fashion as we did in the previous world?
Crystal: Useless propositions.
Ameera: Useless? I beg to differ. You may have been unaware of the various language games you've played back there and they may or may not apply anymore.
Crystal: Why do you call them games?
Ameera: Yes, games. We all played "games" with each other whether it was to convey information or try to get close enough to sleep with each other!
Crystal: Whoa. Slow down, cowgirl.
Kaitlyn: I fail to see the implications from all this.
Ameera: If the linguistic formulations we used back there don't apply up here how can we expect to accurately describe our thinking up here?
Crystal: This is getting way too complicated for my blood.
Ameera: Blood? What blood? What flesh? See what you did there?
Crystal: Figure of speech, pal.
Ameera: I know this but what if there are others here that do not understand it? After all there are countless generations out there, supposedly. Aside from the terminological gap, there's probably a mannerism gap here too.
Kaitlyn: This place promotes unity and grace above all else.
Ameera: At the sacrifice of someone's tradition no doubt.
Crystal: You can't expect to please everyone you know.
Ameera: Well that's the way this place was 'promoted' to me as a kid.
Kaitlyn: You revert back to your childhood often.
Ameera: It wasn't a difficult upbringing at all. It just seemed as though the truth was always hidden from me.
Kaitlyn: What do you mean?
Ameera: For example, when my grandfather passed. One morning I received a call that his health was taking a turn for the worst and to arrive at the hospital as fast as I could. Trouble was, I got there faster than everyone else.
Crystal: So? That's good wasn't it?
Ameera: Not really. I stood there for about 30 minutes alone with him, talking to him, expecting him to be able to hear. At one point I found myself staring at his chest and convinced myself that he was breathing. It wasn't until the others arrived that I found out he passed away the night before.
Kaitlyn: I see now.
Crystal: Aw, I'm sorry but cheer up! He could be right outside this door and down the corridor and beyond that other door!
Ameera: He could very well be.
Crystal: Then why don't we start heading that way!
Kaitlyn: Let's make that long awaited reunion take place.
Ameera: I'm not ready yet.
Crystal: What? Are you kidding me?
Ameera: Hear me out.
Crystal: We've heard plenty from you already.
Ameera: Are we ever going to have any use for value judgments again?
Crystal: Who cares!
Ameera: What about pets did any of you own a pet?
Kaitlyn: As a child once, yes.
Crystal: I owned a parrot!
Kaitlyn: No one can truly own an animal. We can only domesticate it to the point where it realizes all its needs are met in a confined area.
Crystal: That's true.
Ameera: My point in asking if pets are even allowed up here is because if my best friend is also up here and She had an allergic reaction to dogs, do her allergies go away?
Kaitlyn: Probably not. I think there are no animals here.
Crystal: I'm pretty sure about that, Kaitlyn.
Ameera: There's one of my grievances right there! They are depriving animal lovers of what they loved the most, animals!
Crystal: I never thought I'd hear any grievance that's for sure. But I knew for a long time that animals are banned from this place.
Kaitlyn: It's an unjustified grievance. Animals don't have souls so how could it be possible for them to even make it here?
Ameera: I beg to differ. Animals could suffer just like we did which implies they strived to maximize their pleasures in avoidance of pain.
Kaitlyn: Just like we did? How can animals understand the passing of a family member or the loss of a job?
Ameera: I can't prove in what measure they could empathize with themselves or each other but what if we were allowed pets and your pet happened to be a hindrance to me?
Crystal: So, what if?
Ameera: Then I would be annoyed, distraught, frustrated and even angry.
Kaitlyn: But you're stating a hypothetical and there's no use for any follow up theories here. So can you please just save this discussion for another time, Ameera?
Ameera: No because stepping out of this room and into an animal deprived world is not my idea of an ideal paradise.
Kaitlyn: ……Okay.
Crystal: I think you are trying to trick us into not enjoying ourselves here! Nice try!
Ameera: No trickery here just frustrations that I can't seem to shake from my mind.
Kaitlyn: You should try to banish them if you except to enjoy yourself here.
Ameera: I can't. It's not that easy.
Crystal: Easy as pie for me!
Ameera: Of course it's easy for you. I bet this place is living up to all of your expectations!
Crystal: Not yet! I still need to see what's beyond the large corridor and beyond the other door and beyond…
Ameera: Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't think it's all it's cracked up to be, based on the stories I've heard growing up.
Crystal: I bet they were all true stories at that!
Kaitlyn: One thing you cannot deny is that you are here.
Ameera: I won't deny that nor will I deny if this place truly exists. Before I used to think existence preceded essence but now I'm not so sure.
Kaitlyn: Other way around. Your essence is what granted you permission here after all.
Ameera: My essence? I thought it was the result of my actions and of my free will.
Crystal: Let's not get into a free will debate. It's useless here.
Ameera: All I'm saying is that I thought it was my actions that brought me here. Actions based on the choices I made. I mean I must have good judgment or I suppose I would be sweating profusely elsewhere.
Kaitlyn: Your essence guided your judgments. How else do you explain the foundations of those judgments?
Ameera: I would say since we all come from different backgrounds that our "foundations" couldn't possibly have been the same. Consider the origins of morality and you will find that they were a result of………
Crystal: HIM!
Ameera: No it was a result of resentment.
Crystal: ……..
Kaitlyn: I resent no one. You couldn't harbor resentment otherwise you wouldn't be here.
Ameera: I didn't say I harbored resentment. But the roots of my judgments must come from what I feel is wrong and not from what I feel is right.
Crystal: Well right now I think it's wrong for us to stay here and leaving our loved ones unfulfilled by our presence. They don't even know we are here.
Ameera: Exactly! What about fulfillment? I don't mean what you just said but wouldn't you miss the feeling after creation?
Crystal: I'm pretty sure there are plenty of people beyond this room down the larger corridor and beyond that other door to make you fulfilled.
Ameera: Is that all you require to feel fulfilled?
Kaitlyn: Maybe the case for Crystal. She's clearly an extrovert and you're clearly an introvert.
Ameera: I am.
Crystal: No reason to be sheltered up here. Don't tell me you plan to be antisocial with your own family!? As much as you've had to say in this room alone you must have more to say to others out there.
Ameera: I didn't always get along with everyone in my family.
Kaitlyn: Why is that?
Ameera: It was all ideological really. Particularly as it relates to spiritual matters
Kaitlyn: Ah, so your Atheism was found to be harmful to them?
Ameera: Yes which didn't make my formative years very smooth if I do say so myself.
Crystal: Oh brother! Another rebellious teen story coming up!
Ameera: Actually it's far more recent and less simple than you think. Respect has to be earned not inherited.
Kaitlyn: Elaborate.
Ameera: Very well I was on break from medical school and so took up an internship at a nearby hospital.
Crystal: You used your vacation to work more? You must be the life of the party.
Ameera: I was on break with a co-worker and we were debating the merits of personal responsibility.
Crystal: You arguing with another human being? That must mean today is a day that ends in Y.

ACT II
Narrator: Ameera reflects upon that day and remembered that it all began when she walked into her office and saw on her desk a manila folder. Inside were legal documents that stated that she was being sued for medical malpractice. The prosecution was the sister of the victim of the alleged malpractice. The victim's name was Jaralyn and she was a woman who Ameera misdiagnosed, not realizing that she suffered from depression. Jaralyn would later commit suicide not having proper treatment. Feeling overwhelmed, Ameera rashly crammed the file in a desk drawer and rushed out to meet up with Scotty for their lunch date.
[Ameera keeps her head down slightly as she feels her heart rate has accelerated upon reading the lawsuit. Scotty takes note and speaks up.]
Scotty: You okay Ameera?
Ameera: [Looks up] what did you say? I'm sorry I wasn't listening.
[Scotty smirks slightly amused as she takes a swig of her coffee]
Scotty: I noticed. What's going on with you?
Ameera: Nothing Scotty, just a long day at work. My desk is littered with case files and I performed a brain biopsy and oversaw two surgeries today. I'm just a bit tired.
Scotty: I can appreciate that. I was in a meeting concerning the Oncology wing of the hospital today. Our funding is getting slashed again.
Ameera: That frustrates me immensely. They take away money from the wing whose job it is to treat cancers and yet we'll find money to install vending machines whose contents contribute to cancers in the first place.
[As they're talking they come upon a homeless man holding a change cup. Scotty stops and produces a $50 bill and folds it in half and places it in the can. The two exchange pleasantries as Ameera is silent before her and Scotty resume walking]
Ameera: You gave that homeless man $50? Are you kidding me?
Scotty: Oh boy… [She grins slightly] here we go.
Ameera: Don't here we go me! You just told me that the oncology wing, the very same wing within which you practice medicine and sustain a livelihood, got its budget cut and you're willing to part with $50 to a man you don't even know?!
Scotty: Even despite the budget cuts, I can assure you he needs it more than I do Ameera. Besides, I would hardly classify helping that man as an act of fiscal irresponsibility.
Ameera: I would, you work hard for your money and you don't know one iota about the man you just gave it to. That's not effective charity that's blindness!
Scotty: It's my money Ameera. Somebody could just as easily condemn me for not giving more to that man considering I got myself coffee.
Ameera: But you're responsible and live your life in such a way that you find pleasure in a cup of coffee and it's a pleasure you can afford yourself without debt greeting you.
Scotty: [Laughs] so that man is in massive debt? I'm sure those tattered socks he was wearing cost a fortune.
Ameera: He might be! He might be someone that handled his money horribly or at the very least his priorities! What if that man is an alcoholic and he spends every penny of your generosity on booze?
Scotty: Then that's his choice to make and it doesn't change the fact that in this world, people fall through the cracks sometimes and it probably does their hearts good seeing hands outstretched to pull them up. Besides, everybody should have something to look forward to. That man can now look forward to a full belly and for at least a brief moment not have to worry where the next meal is coming from.
Ameera: Yeah, I'm sure he'll feel plenty full on his possible liquid diet.
Scotty: Ameera!
Ameera: [Shrugs] I'm sorry Scotty, but I am a big believer in personal responsibility. You know I don't believe in deities and I don't believe there is a deep down from which a good person is to be found or any of that junk. We are what we do Scotty and that man's actions are what left him in his present state of poverty and squalor. The moment he owns that and recognizes that only his actions can break the cycle of poverty will his life change.
Scotty: Ameera look, I don't disagree with you that personal responsibility is a factor. But that's just it, personal responsibility is a single factor a midst a very complex and frustrating world. Wealth inequality and the elements that feed it can't be overcome by a mere embracing of personal responsibility.
Ameera: That's the problem with society today. Everyone is too terrified to discover the depth and limitations of their personal freedom. This is why I laud competition, because it forces people to face those limitations head on by actively engaging their fellow man in a way that is mutually productive. By you just giving that man money without him earning it, what do you impart to him in that exchange? What has he discovered about himself by you just giving him $50 rather than you forcing him to dig down deep and learn what he is capable of?
Scotty: He discovered that he gets to live another day with the hope that his life could get better. A person is more than the labor they expend in their lives Ameera.
Ameera: You're wrong Scotty, a person's labor is the entirety of who they are, because every act a person commits whether recreational or otherwise, necessitates an expenditure of one's labor. A hundred people could grease that man's palm with donations of varying size, but I guarantee you that man would accomplish more with his own solitary efforts by putting his own hands to work.
Scotty: You're more visceral than usual today but no one person can do everything alone. Not even you in your life of solitude. If you could, you wouldn't be having lunch with me right now.
Ameera: [Smirks] Whatever. Hey since you're so generous, why don't you pay for my lunch next time? Seeing as how you're so anti-work.
Scotty: [Rolls her eyes jokingly] Nice try Ameera. Good luck with the rest of your shift okay and are you sure you're alright?

[They arrive at the doors of the hospital as Ameera remembers her malpractice she visibly takes a deep breath before looking at Scotty with a slight smile]
Ameera: You too and yes Scotty, for the last time I'm fine. You know how hectic work can be. Anyway, keep me posted on the Oncology funding alright? One thing we can agree on is that board of directors is comprised of a bunch of pricks.
[Scotty spits out her coffee laughing which prompts Ameera to burst into a fit of hysterics. They both walk through the door as we fade back into the white room with each character sitting on the edge of their beds as Ameera finishes out her story]
Crystal: I feel like you were so mean to that man! I didn't think you were such a wicked witch Ameera!
Kaitlyn: While I wouldn't employ that exact language, I sympathize with Crystal here. You knew nothing of that man's situation and appeared so callous to him.
Ameera: I may not have known anything about him, but you can easily invoke that line of argumentation against Scott as well. He didn't know one solitary fact about that man independent of his impoverished status, and yet he freely gave him $50!
Kaitlyn: Ameera, the fact that Scott recognized that poverty was the sole fact he needed to behave ethically. I wish more people only needed that fact to do more for the poor.
Crystal: Yeah! I mean I feel poor when I don't have the latest Prada handbag but no house? I would like die from sheer embarrassment.
Kaitlyn: From more than embarrassment Crystal, and that's a fact that Scotty selflessly noted with her charity. Because of the money Scotty gave that man, he was able to see the day through and greet tomorrow more optimistically than he would have without that money.
Crystal: Scotty just gave the man some sunshine on a cloudy day!
Ameera: But who is going to give him his sunshine the day after the clouds envelope the sun again? What too, about the day after that, and the day after that? The only person that man can truly 100% rely on is himself. If you two and Scotty want to bleed yourselves dry helping someone who won't help themselves be my guest, but the best charity that man could be granted is the insight that he's getting in his own way.
[Crystal bows her head and is silent, slightly depressed by Ameera's worldview]
Kaitlyn: Your attitude about personal responsibility aside, that isn't the true source of my intrigue.
Ameera: [Narrows her eyes] Oh? Then do tell me Kaitlyn, what has you so intrigued?
Kaitlyn: What was bothering you that day?
Ameera: Excuse me?
Kaitlyn: You clearly didn't want Scotty to probe further about your shift given your insistence that everything was fine and then your tangent on personal responsibility. It was clear you were trying to shift Scotty's attention away from the real problem you were grappling with. What was it?
Ameera: Goodness, is it really so hard for people to believe that a lung biopsy and overseeing two surgeries can tire someone out and leave them mentally frazzled? I don't see what's so unbelievable about that.
Kaitlyn: Brain biopsy
Ameera: What?
Kaitlyn: Your shift according to what you told Scotty was a brain biopsy and overseeing two surgeries. Now I may not be a doctor like you, but I'd venture to guess that brain and lung biopsies are two distinct procedures.
[Ameera gets suddenly quiet. Off in the corner Crystal is silently seething]
Kaitlyn: So given that you just shared your story and yet just now had that slip up, I'm led to believe that your entire story was a fabrication. You said when you first came here that you invested so much money, time, and everything else into your education and subsequent practice as a doctor, that you sacrificed your own social life to do it.
Ameera: Yeah I did say that. What's your point Kaitlyn?
Kaitlyn: My point is that one would deduce given your circumstances that Scotty is your closest friend. So why lie to her of all people?
Ameera: I didn't want her to worry okay!?
Kaitlyn: Worry about what Ameera? What happened?
Ameera: I…..
Kaitlyn: You what Ameera? Because if you can't say it here, you'll never be able to say it beyond those doors and it will just be left there to fester, tearing up your insides viciously and endlessly. So say it!
Ameera: A relative of a patient in my care filed a malpractice lawsuit against me alright?!
[Kaitlyn is visibly taken aback by this revelation as her expression softens considerably. Crystal remains silent and almost stoic]
Kaitlyn: Why would she file a suit against you? What happened with your patient Ameera?
Ameera: Her name was Jaralyn. She was a young woman about Crystal's age and she was in her third year of college as an economics major. She had complained of headaches, an inability to concentrate, and sleepless nights. I thought she was having the typical college experience especially considering it was midterm season. I prescribed her some aspirin and told her to make time to rest. But [Ameera pauses]
Kaitlyn: But what Ameera?
Ameera: But…she never followed up with me after that. A few days later her sister stormed into my office and informed me Jaralyn had committed suicide.
Kaitlyn: Oh no…
[Crystal is visibly annoyed as she has her arms folded and her fingers are tapping her elbow rapidly]
Ameera: I was shell shocked by the news. Then a few days later I got served the malpractice suit. I ended up here before it ever went to court.
[Crystal can't talk it anymore, she advances towards Ameera and stops just inches from her face, her whole body trembling as her eyes gleamed with rage]
Crystal: You liar! You damn liar! You wretched liar!
[Crystal begins throwing a tantrum. She runs over to her bed and repeatedly whacks her pillow against the wall behind it and then furiously throws it on the ground and stomps on it. She then lets out a huge scream.]
Kaitlyn: Calm down, Crystal.
Ameera: Whoa. What's your problem?
Crystal: You know what you did! I hate liars!
[She begins kicking the wall in a fit of rage, her face contorted in infuriation. Soon she falls to the ground exasperated, the adrenaline wearing off and sadness taking its place.]
Ameera: I'm sorry okay? I never got over the guilt of Jaralyn losing her life.
[Crystal looks at Ameera with a face of pure bewilderment that quickly hardens once again into anger.]
Crystal: Are you kidding me? You say you feel so guilty and yet you told us to our faces when we first started speaking that you never lost a patient! You're a rotten liar and I doubt you feel anything!
[Kaitlyn gets between Ameera and Crystal as she senses the escalated tension.]
Kaitlyn: You are stressing yourself out over this. I sympathize with your anger Crystal but this is not the way to deal with it.
Crystal: Not the way to deal with it? Kaitlyn, Ameera was responsible for someone taking their life that she could have saved. She wants to drone on endlessly about personal responsibility and yet when she told us about herself she refused to take responsibility for what she did. She's a terrible person and her lies leave me disgusted and beyond heartbroken.
[Crystal buries her face in her hands exasperated upon hearing Ameera's lies.]
Ameera: While I understand why you would be angry with my lies and even disgusted with me as a person, it seems like you're taking my lies very personally and I cannot fathom why.
Kaitlyn: Yeah Crystal, Ameera shouldn't have lied there is no doubt about that, but it's not like Jaralyn was your sister. So why did you have such a violent reaction to the truth about Ameera's situation?
[Crystal looks up from her hands and straight into both Ameera and Kaitlyn's faces.]
Crystal: You guys seriously haven't figured it out yet? God, idiots!

[Ameera and Kaitlyn both look at each other with confused expressions. Ameera then turns her attention towards Crystal.]

Ameera: I am afraid we still don't follow wherever your head is at Crystal. I already apologized for having lied to you and I lied because I'm not exactly proud of that moment in my career. Human beings are prone to conceal their wounds from others so you can hardly hold it against me that I wouldn't divulge something so sensitive and intimate to two complete strangers.

Kaitlyn: I am inclined to agree with Ameera on that point Crystal. I can wholly understand why Ameera wouldn't want to be forthcoming with two strangers about such a glaring blight upon her life and career as a doctor. It's in our nature to present the best version of ourselves to each other and you more than anyone should know that with your designer clothes and high end phones. So why are you so angry about Ameera merely adhering to her nature?
[Crystal begins massaging her temples roughly with her fingers, she sighs annoyed with both Kaitlyn and Ameera and begins to speak.]
Crystal: Okay so like, think about it like this. My friend Heather is this really obnoxious gambler and whenever we would go to the casino together I was always miserable.
Ameera: Why were you miserable?
Kaitlyn: My question is why would you go to the casino with someone who you know has a gambling problem? That sounds both sadistic and masochistic to me.
Crystal: I didn't know she had a gambling problem at the time Kaitlyn! To answer your question Ameera, it was because she always went broke quickly and yet refused to leave the casino.
Ameera: Ah, her blood stirs at the sight of slot machines and roulette tables eh?
Crystal: Yeah I always assumed she just really loved it like how I really love to collect vintage Barbie dolls. But-
Ameera: I'm sorry Crystal but I fail to see the connection between this story and the horrible evil I apparently inflicted upon you with my lie.
Crystal: I wasn't finished with the story Ameera! God first you lie, and then you interrupt me, can I please just finish my story?
[Ameera looks at Crystal with an expression of sheer annoyance, but permits her to continue]
Crystal: As I was saying before I was interrupted, Heather loved gambling for as long as I have known her. But I learned it was a full blown addiction for her when she was completely broke and had to crash with me otherwise she'd be homeless.
Kaitlyn: Well I must say it was kind of you to let her stay with you. I don't know many people who would exhibit such moral character.
Crystal: I only did it because she promised me she would get help and get back on her feet. I wouldn't have done it otherwise because I knew I couldn't have taken that on.
Ameera: Did she keep that promise or did she lie?

[Crystal looks at her agitated at being interrupted yet again]

Crystal: If I could finish the story Ameera you'd have the answer to your question!

Ameera: Alright, alright! Finish the story already it is not like we have anywhere to be anyway. Please, continue.
[Crystal sighs and resumes her story]
Crystal: Anyway, she actually did keep her promise and started going to meetings. She was super excited to be around others who had the same issues she did.
Kaitlyn: I imagine such an experience was very therapeutic for her?
Crystal: It was and after a few years, she found new work and really had her life together.
Kaitlyn: That sounds wonderful. Did you believe it would last?
Crystal: I wanted to believe it. She swore to me that she would never gamble again. We even pinky swore on it which we hadn't done since we were kids!
[Kaitlyn rolled her eyes and Ameera stifles a groan but Crystal takes no note of this.]
Crystal: Then one day I was out with this guy who was completely unlike his profile when I got a call from Heather. She got this idea that she could stroll into a casino and not play any games.
Kaitlyn: Why would she put herself so clearly in the presence of such a trigger?
Crystal: I still to this day can't figure that out Kaitlyn. She gave me this lame excuse that she wanted to know she conquered her addiction by confronting it head on.
Ameera: I'm guessing this confrontation, much like your riveting date, didn't end well?
[Crystal sighed annoyed with Ameera's interjections]
Crystal: No Ameera it didn't. It took fifteen minutes for her to treat the casino like a celebrity treats a black card. She thought she could spend money and not suffer for it.
Ameera: How did you handle Heather's relapse?
Crystal. I couldn't bring myself to forgive her. She lied to me and couldn't get over her issues. So I couldn't get over her lie. That was where my sheer hatred of lying really started.
[Ameera and Kaitlyn exchange glances with each other, and then Kaitlyn turns to Crystal to speak.]
Kaitlyn: Crystal…..while that story is tragic, Ameera and I still fail to see the connection between Heather's lie in your story with Ameera's lie about her life. If I didn't know any better, I'd say you reacted more out of a deeply rooted trauma than an authentic anger.
Crystal: Do I need to put five dollars in your hand and direct you to where you can buy a clue Kaitlyn?
Kaitlyn: No, but perhaps you can tell me what you mean anyway?
Crystal: Look it is like this, Heather couldn't overcome being a liar and an addict despite being in a place like rehab that cared for her and tried changing her for the better. Ameera just lied in a place that should have made us all better.
[Ameera looks at Crystal incredulously and takes stock of the room around her.]
Ameera: Okay, now I really don't understand you. How was a small room like this supposed to change anything at all about who we innately are or the capabilities we possess?
Kaitlyn: I still don't follow you either Crystal. Though I must confess your line of thinking is finally starting to intrigue me. Please continue.
Crystal: Okay so like, do you guys remember the Guardian?
Ameera: Of course we do what kind of a question is that?
Kaitlyn: Patience Ameera. Let Crystal make her argument. We're all stuck with each other here and have got ample time on our hands. Petty antagonisms like the ones you two have engaged in do nothing for our collective condition here and if anything, only worsen it.
[Ameera looks at Kaitlyn and crosses her arms and gazes off to the side irritated but then goes to the opposite end of the room distancing herself from Crystal.]
Kaitlyn: It is time to end this meaningless squabble so Crystal, please continue articulating your argument so that we may resolve this discourse and move on.
Crystal: Okay so the only word I understood in that whole sentence was when you said continue so thank you Kaitlyn! Anyway, obviously the Guardian is not someone you would expect to see back home. Also Ameera, did you notice how Kaitlyn entered this room?
[Kaitlyn looks at Crystal curiously]
Kaitlyn: How I entered this room? Was there something particularly unique about my entrance?
Crystal: There was a blinding flash of light that occurred before you appeared in the room with us. It was like something out of a magic show or a performance at the Grammys! Ameera you saw it too right?
[Ameera looks up at Crystal and merely nods as Kaitlyn's expression shows surprise.]
Kaitlyn: A flash of light you say? Why, if the both of you hadn't asserted that such a phenomenon occurred I would have found the notion utterly ridiculous!
Crystal: Well it's true! The fact that you came into the room that way suggests that this place is completely different from home and operates on its own rules. I thought when we came here……it would be a clean slate for us.
Kaitlyn: Why can't that still be the case for us? We've got an eternity in here Crystal don't you think such a copious amount of time is enough for us to forge whatever kind of life we desire for ourselves?
Crystal: No Kaitlyn I don't!
[It is at this point that Ameera's ears prick up as her eyes shift intently on Crystal. Kaitlyn's expression becomes one of shock at the boldness of Crystal's claim]
Kaitlyn: Now you've just gone mad! You make it seem like whatever is beyond that door has just become meaningless due to Ameera's lie.
Crystal: The time we have in this room together, whatever lies beyond that door, it is all about as worthless as the closet of designer clothes I have at home and believe me, it hurts to say it.
[Ameera rolls her eyes but does not interject]
Kaitlyn: Why would you say that Crystal? What happened to all the excitement you had about what lied behind that door?
Crystal: Kaitlyn don't you see? We have entered a world where Guardians exist and they can bring things and people here with a blinding flash of light, and yet we're still the same exact people we were back on Earth.
[Kaitlyn sits on her bed with her head lowered as she processes what Crystal said to her. Moments later she looks up into Crystal's eyes to continue their conversation.]
Kaitlyn: Why is that such a bad thing? No matter where I go in life, I always want to be me. I couldn't care less if the place had Guardians or not. That should make no difference.
[Ameera stays quiet as Crystal sighs upon hearing Kaitlyn's words but soon resumes speaking.]

Crystal: Kaitlyn, coming here was supposed to be our second chance. I always pictured Paradise as something beyond the Malibu Barbie beach house complete with pink convertible sports car I use to play with when I was five years old.
[Ameera sighs to herself upon hearing Crystal use the words Barbie and Paradise in the same breath but keeps quiet. Kaitlyn stares at Crystal and could only nod slightly. Soon however, she resumed speaking.]
Kaitlyn: What I am failing to grasp Crystal, is why that vision of Paradise as you described it is now out of our reach? Why can we not take this opportunity to become better people? To improve and indeed repair the bridges we either damaged or outright burned back on Earth?
Crystal: Because Kaitlyn, Ameera's lie has shown me that I can change my handbags, my lipstick, my clothes, but I can't change the type of person I am. People are more complex than clothes unfortunately.
[Kaitlyn furrows her brow at this notion and indeed finds it deeply distressing. Ameera's eyes look up towards Crystal as if she had connected with something Crystal said.]
Kaitlyn: That's just preposterous Crystal! Of course people can change! Addicts have overcome their addictions before and Heather was and still is capable of doing the same!
[Crystal laughs bitterly at the notion and shakes her head]
Crystal: Kaitlyn, people don't overcome their addictions, they manage them. The only reason Heather probably won't relapse here is because there are no slot machines or roulette wheels to play.
Kaitlyn: So you're saying Heather has no willpower at all? That it is all her environment? My word you're a cynic!
Crystal: Don't you get it? The "choice" as you deemed it for Heather to not be a gambler in a place like this would be like saying I have a choice to not spend $500 on a luxury bag in a place that only sells soup!
[All Kaitlyn could do was stare at Crystal with an expression of disbelief. Meanwhile, Ameera had raised her head fully making her eyes completely meet with the interaction at hand. She couldn't believe it but, she found herself in agreement with Crystal.]
Kaitlyn: Even if you're right Crystal, even if this environment we're in forces Heather to stop gambling rather than her choosing it of her own free will, that still doesn't answer why you won't take responsibility for yourself and better your relationships here and now!
[Ameera stayed quiet but shifted her gaze to Crystal. Crystal lets out a heavy sigh before addressing Kaitlyn.]
Crystal: Because we are no different than the people we were when we were on Earth and because of that, our relationships and all of the drama that comes with them will be the same as well.
[Crystal's apparent pessimism struck a chord with Ameera and her worldview. Kaitlyn on the other hand couldn't help but be dumbfounded.]
Kaitlyn: One minute you're this bubbly unrestrained personality and now you're sounding like someone who just got finished reading the poetry of Edgar Allan Poe! What has gotten into you?
Crystal: Nothing more than the truth Kaitlyn. Like, I could talk to Heather sure, and we could cry and hug and ruin our makeup in the process, but soon the problems would begin piling up.
[Kaitlyn puts up a hand to interject]
Kaitlyn: Every relationship has problems Crystal that's no excuse not to work through them!
(Crystal swats Kaitlyn's hand away annoyed)
Crystal: Oh sure we could try to work them out, but soon she would complain about how there is nowhere for her to gamble. It wouldn't be long after that that I would snap at her and undo everything.
Kaitlyn: But you don't know that!
Crystal: BUT I DO KAITLYN!

[Kaitlyn flinches and Crystal responds with a remorseful expression]
Crystal: I'm sorry Kaitlyn but the fact is this is our situation now and please, if anyone should complain about being stressed it is me! I can't even go to any clubs to cope! This is like; the worst thing to happen to humanity since my biggest celebrity crush got engaged.
[It is at this point in the conversation that Ameera steps forward. Kaitlyn sits down on her bed with her head bowed.]
Ameera: So that is why you got so angry with my lie….because it shows that the worst aspects of each of our beings has crossed over into this place.
[Crystal nods solemnly]
Ameera: I actually agree with you Crystal. If I can still carry over my guilt over Jaralyn's death into this place and deal with that guilt unhealthily through lying, then that means all of us here are still capable of awful things and that we haven't progressed towards anything virtuous at all.
Crystal: If anything, it's life as we knew it but extended to eternity. Man and I just realized too there will be no shopping malls either so I am stuck in this outfit forever.
[Crystal buries her face in her hands while Ameera just looks at her. Kaitlyn remains sitting on her bed staring straight at the wall when suddenly she speaks.]
Kaitlyn: So that's it? You two are just going to wallow in your unfulfilled hopes and resign yourself to your conclusions?
Ameera: Kaitlyn, we know this must be upsetting for you to hear, but everything Crystal said makes sense. I know I'm as shocked about it as you are.
[Ameera snickers slightly and Crystal just stands back and smirks slightly irritated]
Crystal: Ignoring that Ameera! Listen Kaitlyn, I know you're hurt by what I and Ameera have said but it could be so much worse for you! You could have entered this place with your makeup smudged and a horrid outfit but you look totally stunning like super sparkle!
[Kaitlyn just looks at Crystal not saying anything.]
Crystal: Hey, I know how you feel. To think Heather and I won't rebuild our friendship, or that there are no concerts or that I'll never know again the taste of pumpkin spice lattes, it's rough. But we might as well get through this together We can at least be bestiest friends forever right?
[Kaitlyn looks up at her with a seething expression]
Kaitlyn: You don't know how I feel Crystal. You couldn't even begin to understand how I feel.
[Crystal was taken aback by Kaitlyn's tone. Ameera remained silent]
Kaitlyn: You're twenty years old Crystal, that is a tragic time for any young woman to lose her life, but when you get beyond the euphoria of youth you find something even more pleasurable; stability. You understand that don't you Ameera?
[Ameera shifted her gaze to Kaitlyn and gave her a small nod. Kaitlyn resumed speaking]
Kaitlyn: What you guys don't know about my share of the accident and why I am so distraught is that I was driving home from my lover's house and wanted to beat my husband there.
[Ameera and Crystal stare at Kaitlyn with their mouths agape]
Ameera: You were married and you had an affair? So you lied earlier when you said it wasn't for you?
[Kaitlyn nods solemnly in admission]
Kaitlyn: Yes Ameera I lied just as you did earlier regarding you losing a patient and your malpractice suit.
Ameera: Why did you lie? Not judging you given the gravity of my omission, but after the grilling I've received I'd like to know why you did it being so self-aware how wrong it is.
Kaitlyn: I've never known a woman to be forthcoming about her extramarital affairs. It is a point of shame for me.
Ameera: Shame is certainly a feeling I can sympathize with. But I have to ask, what about your wedding ring? I don't see a ring on your finger.
Kaitlyn: I always took it off and placed it in my jewelry box when I would have time with my lover. I wonder if it's still there.
Crystal: I could be mad that everyone here seems to be a liar but this is just scandalous! Was he a hottie?
[Ameera shot Crystal a glare and Crystal immediately took note. Kaitlyn looked up at them both with tears in her eyes]
Kaitlyn: I'm not proud of what I did. I took my husband and the love and stability he afforded my life for granted by having an affair and now I have forever sullied the bond between us in this wretched place! All because I wanted to feel loved and beautiful!
[Kaitlyn broke out in hysterical sobs and buried her face in her hands. Ameera and Crystal both remained silent not knowing how to approach the situation. After a while Ameera spoke up.]
Ameera: Kaitlyn listen, we all make mistakes and have moments of poor judgment. Don't beat yourself up over this when it is evident by your tears that you still love your husband profoundly.
Crystal: How did you two meet anyway?
[A small smile forms on Kaitlyn's lips as she closes her eyes and reflects back to that time.]
Kaitlyn: It was in our freshman year of high school.
Crystal: High school sweethearts? That's so cliché but so adorable!
Kaitlyn: It was one day in Biology class. We were each given horse hearts to observe and I couldn't stomach it so Frank came along seeing my distress and helped me.
Crystal: Horse hearts? That's so gross and cruel! Those poor horses!
Ameera: So your husband's name was Frank then?
[Kaitlyn nods]
Kaitlyn: Fast forward several years and he is operating his own accounting firm and I was on my way to having my own practice in the field of child psychology.
Crystal: Sounds like you two were on top of the world. A more powerful couple than Prom King and Queen!
Ameera: Indeed, those are two impressive jobs you two held. Though I am curious, why child psychology?
[Kaitlyn's eyes shone with a kind of sadness]
Kaitlyn: I have always loved children and have marveled at their intellectual potential. When you're a child, you see anything as possible. I wanted to study that wonder intimately but…..
Ameera: But what?
Kaitlyn: I also got into child psychology because…..I was diagnosed as being infertile and wanted to compensate for never being able to have children of my own.
Ameera: I'm so sorry Kaitlyn
Crystal: Me too. I bet you would have made a great mom!
Kaitlyn: I appreciate the sentiment Crystal. However, Frank and I would find out that the doctors weren't entirely correct and, ironically enough, the one thing we always wanted would be the beginning of our problems.
[Crystal gasps and Ameera nods sternly]
Ameera: So you two wanted to defy medical knowledge and kept trying to conceive anyway right?
[Kaitlyn nods and softly sighs]
Kaitlyn: Eventually, we succeeded. The doctors called it an anomaly while we called it a miracle.
Crystal: That's amazing Kaitlyn! You two must have been so happy!
Kaitlyn: We were elated Crystal. We were finally going to have a family….or so we thought.
[Ameera gives Kaitlyn a look]
Ameera: Don't tell me…..
Crystal: What? What is it Ameera?
Ameera: Kaitlyn lost the baby.
[Crystal gasps and covers her mouth in horror]
Kaitlyn: Yes, I had a miscarriage. We were both devastated and Frank……he never quite came back from it.
Ameera: How do you mean?
Kaitlyn: He became emotionally distant. We were no longer intimate and we barely spoke. There were days I would urge him to talk to me or I would dress sexy to draw his eyes to me, but he was gone.
Crystal: I've had boyfriends like that. They never appreciate all the effort we put in to look good!
Kaitlyn: It was more than that Crystal. It went far beyond being unappreciative. It was hatred that he felt for me. He hated me because he blamed me for losing the baby.
Ameera: How could he possibly blame you? Do you understand how repugnant that sounds?! You were suffering just as much as he was!
Crystal: Yeah what a jerk! Here I thought that guys who wouldn't pay for dinner were low lives. Your husband took it to a whole new level.
[Kaitlyn could feel herself about to cry again but fought back the tears.]
Kaitlyn: It got to the point where he buried himself in his work and I was just an apparition of his former life.
Ameera: So this prolonged sense of neglect is what led you to have an affair?
Kaitlyn: Yes. I just felt like the love we felt for each other had diminished. It had become some ugly and unrecognizable monster. I missed being held, being kissed, and being…..
Ameera: You missed being loved? You missed being his wife instead of someone he lived with?
Kaitlyn: Exactly. So I fled into the arms of another man. He was a coworker named Jim who worked with soldiers returning from war and who suffered with PTSD.
Crystal: Ooooooooh workplace love! That's steamy! Was he married too?
Kaitlyn: No I had a set of rules for myself for pursuing an affair. The first was that the man couldn't be married and the second being that I would never bring them home.
Ameera: You wanted to minimize any further collateral damage right? Have to admit, that is noble even if it happened in the confines of an extramarital affair.
Kaitlyn: He saw that I was down one day after a cold morning with my husband and offered to take me out for coffee. One thing led to another and before I knew it we started an affair that lasted three months.
Crystal: Three months? That's longer than most of my relationships!
[Ameera resists releasing an annoyed sigh but narrows her gaze at Kaitlyn]
Ameera: So why did it end? After all, this conversation all started because you were distraught that you wouldn't be able to make amends with your husband.
Kaitlyn: Well the reason the affair ended was twofold. For one thing, my coworker started falling for me and wanted me to leave my husband.
Crystal: Ah! There is nothing quite like an intense love triangle!
Kaitlyn: The problem with that is I never loved him. I never felt an emotional connection with him during intercourse as it was purely recreational. It was a form of escapism from my crumbling marriage.
Ameera: But he interpreted it differently. Was it hard breaking it off with him?
Kaitlyn: Not really. I told him from the beginning that our relationship was to be purely casual. However, he conflated our arrangement for affection and I cut the cord quickly to minimize the pain.
Crystal: Aww man! That's not dramatic! The novels I read do affairs so much better!
[Ameera looks at Crystal and just shakes her head]
Ameera: More importantly, what was the second reason you ended the affair?
Kaitlyn: The second reason was because soon after I ended the affair, Jim tried getting me back. He said he wanted to meet for lunch during our work break and explain himself.
Crystal: So the plot does thicken after all!
Ameera: Did you go see him?
Kaitlyn: Yes I indulged him both to hear him out and to deescalate the situation. When I got there he explained that he wanted to keep seeing me and that he understood it was purely casual.
Ameera: So what did you say?
Kaitlyn: I was actually leaning towards resuming my relationship with him to be honest. He was fun and sweet when we were together and the pleasures we shared helped fill the void.
Crystal: Well if that's the case, what stopped you?
Kaitlyn: My husband did. Frank called me and when I answered he broke down in sobs. He apologized profusely for being so distant and told me he didn't want to lose me.
Crystal: Awwwww! That is so sweet!
Kaitlyn: He told me all he ever wanted was a family and he took our inability to make one out on me. He says what he realized was as long as he had me he would be okay.
Ameera: That was the point when you left the restaurant to see him?
[Kaitlyn nods softly, tears forming in the corners of her eyes.]
Kaitlyn: I started crying after I hung up and when Jim tried consoling me I brushed past him and raced for my car. In that moment, Jim no longer existed or mattered to me.
[A look of guilt starts spreading over Crystal's face but she remains silent]
Kaitlyn: I got in my car and raced home. My mind swirled with a million different things I wanted to say to Frank. I wanted our marriage to work more than anything in that moment.
Ameera: But you never got the chance because of the collision you had with Crystal….
Kaitlyn: That's right. Frank and I had an emotional chasm between us that was just about to close when I died. Now I'll never get the chance to make things right.
[Kaitlyn then turned to Crystal and looked her square in the eye]
Kaitlyn: Crystal, I think if anyone deserves an apology for injury done to them by my actions, it is you.
Crystal: Kaitlyn don't apolo-
Kaitlyn: No Crystal I am serious. I had a husband who loved and cared about me and we were both so emotionally stunted when the baby died. I handled it horribly.
[Crystal bows her head not saying anything. Ameera had gone in the background of the conversation leaning against the wall.]
Kaiyln: Instead of either leaving my marriage or forcing my husband's hand to talk to me, to acknowledge that I existed, I flew into the arms of another to fill the void.
Crystal: You shouldn't beat yourself up over it; I would have done the same. You're only human.
Kaitlyn: But that's just it! I wasn't just human I was a wife! Yes, I deserved better in my marriage but I should have gone about getting it differently.
Crystal: Do you think…..if you made it home you could have made it work with your husband?
Kaitlyn: I don't know Crystal. I would like to think so. Frank was an incredible man and he was always there for me up until the miscarriage. I had a stable and loving marriage I threw away.
Crystal: You didn't throw it away Kaitlyn…..it's my fa……..
[Crystal's voice trailed off as Kaitlyn looks at her concerned]
Kaitlyn: Crystal what is it? What's wrong?
[Crystal buries her face in her hands and begins crying violently]
Kaitlyn: Oh goodness Crystal what's wrong? It's going to be okay Crystal really!
[Crystal forces herself to stare into Kaitlyn's eyes as her own are filled with tears. Her lip has a slight quiver]
Crystal: Kaitlyn, it's my fault you never made it home to your husband and it's my fault you never got your second chance with your marriage.
Kaitlyn: Crystal that is preposterous! I didn't make it home because I was emotionally overwhelmed and wasn't looking out for your car.
Crystal: I wasn't looking out for anything Kaitlyn! I was completely absorbed in my own life and that's why you're dead!
Kaitlyn: Crystal, what exactly are you talking about?
Crystal: While you were racing home to put your life back together I……I was texting and driving
[Ameera suddenly interjects angrily]
Ameera: Of all the moronic things I have witnessed and heard in my life as a doctor, Crystal what in the world were you thinking?!
Crystal: I know I know I'm so sorry Kaitlyn!
[Ameera clenched her fists and she was seething]
Ameera: You're sorry?! Your immaturity and stupidity cost you your life and more significantly, your irresponsible actions have irreparably ruined Kaitlyn's life yet you want to sit and roast me over the open fire over my omission!? You're the real hypocrite here Crystal!
[Crystal could feel her eyes well up again but Ameera was not having it]
Ameera: No Crystal! You don't get to cry! With how you violently condemned me you suppress those crocodile tears! I want you to look at Kaitlyn and explain yourself!
[At this point Crystal's body is trembling violently. She had not expected Ameera to come at her with such ferocity. Crystal turned to Kaitlyn and addressed her with her head bowed]
Crystal: Kaitlyn I-
Ameera: Look at her Crystal!
Kaitlyn: Ameera let the poor girl be! I don't need you fighting my battles for me and as I have said already I take responsibility.
Ameera: The way you acted was reckless as well Kaitlyn I am hardly fighting your battle! I do not speak with such anger to give you absolution.
Kaitlyn: Then why treat Crystal like this? Like she's a child?
Ameera: Because she is Kaitlyn! She has been acting like a child from the moment she got here and she is treating this like one big joke and it isn't.
Kaitlyn: I understand that but it has got to be just as hard for Crystal to realize she's dead and to be stuck in this place as it has been for us.
Ameera: I doubt that Kaitlyn as anyone who is imbecilic enough to text and drive simultaneously has not put a high value on their life! This is a big laugh for her!
[Kaitlyn sighs and turns to face Crystal]
Kaitlyn: Crystal I want you to look at me please.
[Crystal forces herself to look at Kaitlyn, her face contorted in an expression of sheer pain.]
Kaitlyn: Yes, what you did was wrong and idiotic, but so was me starting an affair and then letting my emotions about it overwhelm me behind the wheel.
[Crystal's expression shifted to one of astonishment hearing Kaitlyn's words. Ameera had gone quiet but was still seething inside]
Kaitlyn: Crystal, I forgive you and I am not angry. I know you're sorry and for me that's enough. The only real tragedy is that my husband and I will never be as we were before ever again.
[The absolution that Kaitlyn afforded Crystal moved her so deeply that Crystal fell to her knees]
Crystal: Thank you Kaitlyn! Thank you so much and I am so sorry! I wish I could take it back but all I can say is I am sorry!
[Kaitlyn walks over to Crystal and kneels in front of her and wraps her arms around Crystal and hugs her tightly as tears streamed lightly down her face.]
Kaitlyn: It's okay Crystal. Everything is going to be alright.
[Crystal held Kaitlyn tightly only crying and not uttering a word.]
Kaitlyn: Hey, you don't want to smear your makeup now do you? It's going to be alright.
[Crystal breaks away from the hug and looks at Kaitlyn with a soft smile and a slight laugh. Her eyes shone with relief and even a kind of joy being with Kaitlyn in this moment.]
Crystal: You're right Kaitlyn. Last thing I need is to look ugly in this place. Thank you.
[Ameera finally stepped forward and looks at Kaitlyn and Crystal]
Ameera: Guys I wanted to apologize too.
Kaitlyn: For what Ameera?
Crystal: Yeah, what did you do wrong? Or did you just see this hug and wanted to get in on it?
[Ameera slightly laughs and shakes her head]
Ameera: No Crystal the way I talked to you was wrong. I stand by that how you came to die was stupid, but you're dead just like we are and I shouldn't kick you while you're down.
[Crystal smiles at Ameera and shakes her head]
Crystal: I appreciate that Ameera but you were right. I didn't value my life at all and now it's gone. Also, I apologize too. I was a hypocrite for lashing out at you for lying and I totally understand your anger towards me.
Ameera: I feel like my anger towards you stemmed from a similar outlook as you have about how you treated your life.
Kaitlyn: Really Ameera? How so?
Ameera: Well I devoted my life to being a doctor and healing people and now I can't do that anymore here and I feel displaced.
[Kaitlyn and Crystal nod in agreement]
Ameera: I was always logical in my approach to life. I never allowed myself to indulge in some of its offerings because they had no place in my worldview.
Kaitlyn: You mean like religion?
[Ameera smirks slightly]
Ameera: Not exactly. I'm still a non-believer at heart despite being in a fantastical place like this. However, the community that comes with religion, I never got to feel that sense of community while I was alive.
Crystal: Yeah I remember you said you sacrificed your social life to be a doctor. I can't take a Friday night not going out but my whole life? That's brutal.
Ameera: I can at least take solace in the fact that I gave meaning to my life. I healed many people, confronted many illnesses and families in despair only to make them smile again.
Kaitlyn: It must have taken a toll on you though, to look at those families in their happiness and warmth and realize you didn't have that.
Ameera: It was like swallowing shards of glass some days. There were just times the loneliness would get to me but I never showed it.
Crystal: Why didn't you change your life? I spend ten hours changing outfits and you had fifty years to change your life.
Ameera: I thought if I changed my life I would be sacrificing the success I gained from the life I was already living.
Kaitlyn: So you were against big changes in your life?
[Ameera nods]
Ameera: I am a big believer in incremental changes to my life. Spontaneity was adversarial to how I lived.
Crystal: I was always the opposite. My life revolved around spontaneity and impulse. I think we could have learned from each other.
[Ameera looks at Crystal and smiles]
Ameera: I guess we'll have plenty of time to do that now. If time is irrelevant here and nothing really changes, it's not like there will be much else to do.
[Kaitlyn and Crystal nod and gesture towards Ameera to come in for the hug. She tentatively walks towards them and accepts it.]
Kaitlyn: I must say ladies, if I was to share being dead with anybody, It could have been far worse than what this turned out to be.
[Crystal and Ameera share a laugh]
Crystal: Thanks….I think. Though I must agree, you two gals are alright. Better than most of my girlfriends back home.
Ameera: Most? What are we not as fashionable as your other friends?
[Crystal grins]
Crystal: Well actually Ameera, I will definitely help you with your color coordination while we're here and Kaitlyn, when was the last time you got your hair done?
[Kaitlyn feigns offense]
Kaitlyn: I went to my hairdresser last week thank you!
Crystal: Oh…….well they're horrible! Thank goodness I died when I did or you'd be in this place looking like a mess!
[The women share a good laugh over Crystal's morbid humor]
Ameera: Maybe we'll get you to read more Crystal. Broaden your horizons beyond clothes, concerts, and clubs.
Crystal: I find reading to be for like old people but if you have an E-Reader I'll try!
[Kaitlyn and Ameera share a stare and a groan]
Kaitlyn: It will be a daunting task Ameera, but I am up for it if you are!
Ameera: I mean I've healed people from extreme illness before and saved lives so how bad can this be? Although I say that and it is Crystal…..
[Crystal sticks her tongue out at Kaitlyn and Ameera]
Crystal: Very funny you guys! I'll have you know I read plenty!
Ameera: Oh really? What exactly do you read?
Crystal: I'll have you know I am a yearly subscriber to the hottest tabloids and women's magazines!
Kaitlyn: I'm more of a John Steinbeck Grapes of Wrath girl myself. But knowing twenty ways to please your man is riveting too.
Ameera: Agreed! I mean, why bother with classical Greek literature like the Illiad or any Shakespearean tragedy when I can figure out how to spice up my dating life?
Crystal: Ameera! Gross!
[The girls all share a laugh]
Narrator: All appears happy as the girls seemed to have found solace through the camaraderie they have forged in this place. However, it is all a farce.
[Kaitlyn, Ameera, and Crystal are all seen in a circle laughing and talking]
Narrator: For beneath the veneer of happiness and contentment there lies an unbearable anxiety. Fears repressed and sadness buried all in the name of this charade.
[We see now in the same circle Crystal occasionally stealing glances at the open door to the other place.]
Narrator: Human nature though, yearns to be honest and authentic. It needs it like lungs need air and before long, that veneer loses its gleam and the truth reveals itself.
[We see Ameera educating Crystal about human biology as Kaitlyn is off in the corner staring at her hand where a wedding ring should be, sadness across her face.]
Narrator: This truth, like the contents of Pandora's Box, cannot be concealed again once it is set free. Once it is set free…..
[Crystal and Kaitlyn are talking among themselves while Ameera is off in a separate corner staring at the wall.]
Narrator: The end result is misery and contempt which finds its roots in doubt and desire.
[We see the women all standing against different walls on each side of the room. Finally Crystal breaks her silence.]
Crystal: That's it I've had it! I'm going through the door you guys.
[Ameera and Kaitlyn both stared at her in bewilderment]
Kaitlyn: Crystal what has gotten into you? Why this sudden sense of panic?
Crystal: Sudden? Are you serious? I've been staring at that passageway every free moment I get. I'm too curious what lies beyond it guys!
Ameera: You were the one who theorized that nothing lies beyond that door but disappointment. Remember?
Crystal: But what if I am wrong? What if me and Heather can grow closer? What if there are shopping malls and a coffee shop?!
Ameera: Now Crystal, we've done fine here and I think you're suffering from claustrophobia.
[Crystal starts to get angry now]
Crystal: No I am not Ameera! It is not claustrophobia I am just sick of lying to myself and pretending like I am happy being stuck in this room!
[Ameera appears wounded by Crystal's words]
Ameera: Pretending you're happy? So this friendship, this camaraderie that we developed in this room was all a lie?
Crystal: No Ameera. I wasn't pretending about the fun we had.
[Crystal extends her arms out with her palms up towards Ameera]
Crystal: But it isn't enough Ameera. I feel like a caged bird just dying to fly out of here. I can't bear the thought of no more concerts, lattes, or watching my favorite reality shows online!
[Kaitlyn interjects upon hearing this; a look of frustration molds her features]
Kaitlyn: Now wait just a minute Crystal! You don't even know if any of those things you desire are even beyond that door!
Crystal: That's exactly why I say we go straight through it and find out Kaitlyn! Maybe on the other side of that door is everything we ever dreamed would be there when life ended!
Ameera: Or maybe, it will just be more pain and emotional suffering than we endured on Earth while still among the living.
[Crystal doesn't respond and averts Ameera's gaze, eyes drifting towards the door]
Ameera: You were the one who more or less said that our relationships would be exactly the same because if I am capable of lying, then those we love are capable of acts far worse.
Kaitlyn: She's right Crystal. Heather would lie to you and have an itch to gamble, my husband would have a new reason to loathe me, and Ameera…
[There is a silence in the room as Kaitlyn pauses but Crystal speaks for her]
Crystal: Ameera doesn't have anyone she loved or that loves her which is why she doesn't want me to go out that door!
Kaitlyn: Crystal! You mind your tongue besides; Ameera does have a best friend remember? The one with the dog allergy!
[Crystal gives a bitter laugh]
Crystal: Yeah, her best friend was a person she worked with! Everything comes back to the job! He probably hated her just as much as everyone else.
Kaitlyn: Apologize right now Crystal!
Crystal: No Kaitlyn I will not! Ameera sacrificed her social life so she could spend her days surrounded by kids with runny noses and outdated magazines!
Kaitlyn: She used her life to save the lives of others Crystal! That's more than either of us can say about our lives.
Crystal: But the fact remains she could never save herself! That's why she wants to keep us here!
Kaitlyn: Are you mad?!
Crystal: Unless we're all miserable in this room together, Ameera can't be happy because she never allowed herself to be happy and so we're being punished for it!
[Crystal turns to Ameera now. Kaitlyn just stares at the ground stunned as Crystal starts screaming at Ameera.]
Crystal: Is that a lie Ameera?! Is it a lie that because you allowed yourself to become old and bitter, the thought of seeing other people happy makes you sick?! Tell me!
[Ameera has tears in her eyes. At first, she averts Crystal's gaze but after a few moments Ameera forces her eyes to meet Crystal's. She answered Crystal's accusations softly.]
Ameera: Yes Crystal that is a lie. Because I thought in this room, I had found the companionship I had denied myself from having all my life. I thought I finally had real friends.
[Kaitlyn comes between Ameera and Crystal now trying to mediate the situation]
Kaitlyn: But you do Ameera! We are your friends! Crystal is just in a state of delirium being in this room for so long. She's speaking nonsense!
Ameera: No Kaitlyn, nonsense is saying why is the blue sky red? What Crystal hurled at me was vitriol and venom in its purest form. Crystal has developed a hatred for me however irrational.
Kaitlyn: That's not true!
[Kaitlyn turns to Crystal and takes her hands into hers looking into her eyes pleadingly]
Kaitlyn: Crystal, I want you to please remember everything we've been through in this room together. The hardships we swallowed, the laughs we had, the friendship we forged!
[Crystal breaks the hand holding between her and Kaitlyn and glares at her]
Crystal: Why do you care so much about maintaining the peace Kaitlyn? Could it be you're lying to yourself as I tried to?
Kaitlyn: That's absurd and insulting Crystal! Why on Earth would I be trying to lie to myself? What purpose could that possibly serve?
Crystal: The same purpose gambling had for Heather; numbing your pain or at least, making yourself believe that there is no pain at all.
Kaitlyn: All my pain was back on Earth and I have accepted what life with my husband would be like here. I have no pain to numb.
Crystal: There you go again lying to yourself Kaitlyn! You're a worse liar than I was a nail designer at salon school! You don't think I saw you staring at your hand?
[Kaitlyn swallows slightly and doesn't answer]
Crystal: You were staring at your hand, creating a hole in it with your focus because you were longing for your wedding ring. You were longing for the good times of your marriage.
Kaitlyn: That's not true at all Crystal!
Crystal: Yes it is come off it! I know you were longing for it the same way as I have been longing to know what lies on the other side of that door. Just admit it Kaitlyn!
Kaitlyn: No!
Crystal: Admit that you yearn for your husband! Admit that you yearn to know for certain whether or not there can still be a marriage between you and Frank! Just admit it already!
Kaitlyn: Fine okay? I admit that I miss my husband! I admit that I want to rectify my marriage and I admit that I want to hold him close and talk to him! Is that a crime?
[Ameera looks at both Kaitlyn and Crystal completely deflated]
Ameera: Crystal, you're a vile and disingenuous human being and Kaitlyn, your dishonesty disappoints me. I thought we had built something new upon the ashes of our old lives.
[Kaitlyn snaps at Ameera suddenly no longer caring about keeping calm]
Kaitlyn: Oh come off it Ameera! I disappoint you? That's quite a laugh! You act as if everyone here is oblivious to how you stare off in a corner when you think nobody notices!
Crystal: You do what Ameera? You're judging us and you suffer too? Are you kidding me?
Kaitlyn: Exactly! You try and act as this symbol of strength and serenity that should be lauded and yet, you're no stoic! You get the itch for more just as we do!
[Ameera doesn't break her gaze with Kaitlyn, instead her eyes just narrow]
Ameera: What do you want from me Kaitlyn? What exactly is your point?
Kaitlyn: No Ameera, you're asking the wrong question. You're the one who stares off into space so what is it that you want?
Crystal: Yeah! What is distracting you Ameera? Tell us!
[Ameera grimaced slightly and folded her arms. She sighed before she spoke.]
Ameera: I….I wanted to see Jaralyn again.
Kaitlyn: What? You mean you want to see the same woman whose life was lost because you missed the signs of depression? Signs you keep telling yourself you were trained to see?
Ameera: Yes Kaitlyn, that's right.
Crystal: What makes you think she's even here? I was raised to believe that people who do things like that don't get to come to places like this.
Ameera: I don't know Crystal. None of us can really know if Jaralyn is here or not and that's what's maddening.
Kaitlyn: Even if she was, why would you want to see her? Why would you want to reopen those wounds and potentially invite such agonizing pain?
Ameera: I just….I want to know what she thinks of this place. I want to walk beside her on her train of thought that led her to suicide. I want to understand her and most of all….I need to know if she hates me.
Kaitlyn: Where is this masochism masquerading as curiosity coming from?
Ameera: Because as a doctor it was my moral imperative to see the signs! To save her from the very despair and restlessness that was slowly eroding her desire for life and killing her!
Kaitlyn: You can't keep beating yourself up over this. Yes it was a folly of a greater magnitude because it is your profession to be preventative of such illness, but Jaralyn ruled for her life that suicide was the only recourse. She could've talked to other people rather than placing it squarely on your shoulders.
Ameera: Right. I guess I just wanted to see if our paths continued to diverge at the end of our lives despite her end being so abrupt. Where I am filled with regret at how I lived and the mistakes I made, I wonder if she was actually happy with her choice to commit suicide.
Kaitlyn: Well thinking back to Crystal's observations, if we can't really change here and if we can't really progress, then how she feels about this place is a moot point the woman she was when she took her life is the woman she is fated to always be.
Ameera: Why do you say that?
Kaitlyn: Because her reaction wouldn't stem from anything genuine but rather from her inclined response. She would believe this was cosmic punishment of some kind because she took her own life rather than seeing it through. Plus remember, by her nature she suffers from depression and so she carries that over into this place.
Ameera: Yes I suppose you are right Kaitlyn. Pursuing Jaralyn would be an endeavor of shallowness and hollow morals. It would be about making myself feel better all the while her sickness would continue to plague her. I can't face her like that.
Crystal: I hate that I made that point! It has completely frozen you two and made you unwilling to take any action! Well I won't stand for it!
Ameera: Crystal you need to calm down.
Crystal: Why should I listen to a woman that thinks I am such a horrible friend? Why should you care whether I leave or not?
Ameera: Crystal I am sorry I said that to you. I was angry at what you said and was feeling spiteful. I just don't want to see you get hurt.
[Crystal's expression softens and her eyes shone with remorse. Kaitlyn suddenly speaks up.]
Kaitlyn: I'm sorry too Ameera. I shouldn't have snapped at you like I did. You guys are my friends it's just….the curiosity of that cursed door is getting to me.
Ameera: No need to apologize Kaitlyn, I understand. I think we all have that curiosity.
[Kaitlyn could only nod, not wanting to cry again as Ameera laid a comforting hand upon her shoulder.]
Crystal: Guys, I'm sorry too. I was mean to both of you and you guys have really been trying to help me and have been so nice to me while we have been here.
Kaitlyn: It's okay Crystal. I understand completely why you're so upset. You just started growing into your youth and the freedom that comes with it and it was gone before you could enjoy it.
Ameera: Kaitlyn is right. I should have been more empathetic to your frustrations Crystal. You were just really starting to live life and before you knew it you ended up here. I'm sorry.
Crystal: It has just been so hard to let go of everything you know? I miss my girlfriends, my lifestyle, and my hotspots. I just want to believe that all of that is beyond that door.
Kaitlyn: I know how you feel. I look at this hand sometimes and just picture my husband waiting for me on the other side of that door with my ring in one hand and flowers in the other.
Ameera: I envision Jaralyn greeting me with a sly smile and busting my chops over my misdiagnosis. She wouldn't be smug, rather she would just be relieved that she ended her life because she was right to believe something truly better is waiting for her. Or so I want to believe.
Kaitlyn: Do you think she is right Ameera?
Ameera: No I don't but that could just be my guilt talking and thinking there is nothing better than the life we live. In truth I don't know what this place is any more than she does.
Crystal: I guess we'll all have to get used to not knowing. It is like when I had to get used to my girlfriends pulling me away from the bar after so many drinks. I'm no fun drunk.
Kaitlyn: I would have never guessed.
Ameera: Well Crystal while there couldn't be two examples more opposite of each other I do appreciate your sentiment.
[The women all stand in silence for a bit but after a while Ameera speaks up]
Ameera: However…..
Kaitlyn: What is it Ameera?
Ameera: I have been thinking about Crystal's observation and-
Crystal: Please Ameera, I already hate myself for making that point I get it. There is absolutely no reason to go out that door.
Ameera: But that's just it Crystal, what if you were wrong?
[Crystal had an expression of sheer shock on her face and Kaitlyn was quick to interject]
Kaitlyn: Ameera think about what you're saying! We all just made our peace with our situation and you could be feeding all of us nothing more than false hope!
Ameera: I know it is a gamble Kaitlyn but just hear me out. I've given Crystal's arguments a lot of thought and I believe something may have been overlooked.
[Crystal grabs Ameera by the shoulders and looks into her eyes with a desperate but hopeful kind of anxiousness.]
Crystal: Are you serious?! You might have come up with a reason we should walk out that door and you've kept it to yourself?! How long have you been quiet about this?
Ameera: You and I both know the passage of time is irrelevant here Crystal.
Crystal: Don't get smart with me Ameera how long?!
Ameera: Long enough to see that all three of us may be ravenous enough to take on the gamble my argument presents us with.
Kaitlyn: Well, what is the argument Ameera? Crystal's deductions seemed rather solid from the angles I inspected it from.
Crystal: Yeah, out with it already!
[Ameera takes a deep breath and composes herself before speaking]
Ameera: Okay, so we all agree that this place doesn't operate under the same physical laws as Earth correct? We agree the nature of this place is beyond our comprehension?
Kaitlyn: Yes of course I agree Ameera.
Crystal: Are you serious? I've been telling you guys that this place is Paradise but right now all I want is for you to spit it out.
Ameera: Alright. I only asked because we all need to follow this argument from the same starting point.
[Kaitlyn and Crystal nod enthusiastically]
Kaitlyn: We understand Ameera. Please proceed.
Crystal: Anything to give me an excuse to run to the beyond! I haven't wanted to run to a place so fast since my favorite shoe store had this amazing sale last summer!
Ameera: Patience Crystal patience. Now, Crystal you said something during your deductions about my lie that struck a chord with me. You said we're all exactly the same.
Crystal: Yeah Ameera, it seems fairly obvious that we're exactly the same I don't understand how that is some kind of big discovery.
Ameera: Don't you find it weird that we're still exactly the same? In a place where Guardians are apparently the norm?
Kaitlyn: It is somewhat peculiar I do confess.
Crystal: Yeah I guess you may have a point there.
Ameera: Exactly! We have retained our bodies, our personalities, etc. and have been granted nothing new in the process. It is just unfathomable in a place like this.
Kaitlyn: Well apparently it is fathomable in a place like this because here we are in this room still completely normal.
Ameera: But that's just it! In this room we are still completely normal, but what if this is like a waiting room of sorts and beyond those doors we are given a chance to achieve a greater ambition and to be better people?
Crystal: A waiting room? Man I hate those! They always have horrible magazines and smell terrible!
Ameera: Crystal focus! Think about when you're in a waiting room to get a tooth removed. Once you leave the waiting room you have the tooth removed and feel better right?
Kaitlyn: Yes Ameera but of course.
Crystal: Um duh!
Ameera: What if this place is our waiting room? What if this place is the last place where we will ever be weighed down by our past mistakes? What if when we walk out that door we can finally begin to heal from them and redeem ourselves?
Kaitlyn: Heal as in, be able to make right all of our wronged relationships thus getting the clean slate we're all longing for?
Ameera: Yes Kaitlyn exactly. But as I have said, there is a gamble.
Crystal: Oh please! Have you forgotten I'm friends with a gambling addict? This isn't a gamble Ameera!
Ameera: You're only saying that because you more than anyone wants to run to the beyond Crystal but please think about this rationally.
[Crystal folds her arms and grumbles as Ameera continues speaking]
Ameera: If I am wrong there will be nothing but pain and misery because the people who we believe to be our loved ones, will be nothing more than spectres existing for our mockery.
[Kaitlyn bows her head averting the sight of Crystal and Ameera locked in debate]
Crystal: Or our life could be out there Ameera! Heather, Frank, the patients you saved! Jaralyn could be out there ready to grant you peace after all the guilt you carried! Did you ever think about that?

[Ameera was taken aback by the conviction with which Crystal retorted]
Ameera: No Crystal I did not. Did you ever think how you would be able to handle the sight of Heather going crazy having no place to scratch her itch?
[Crystal averts Ameera's gaze.]
Ameera: Have you thought about what would happen if with all of your prodding to get out of here that Kaitlyn could fall apart seeing her husband and being locked in conflict with him?
Kaitlyn: She's right Crystal. I'm sorry but…I can't take that gamble. It would hurt too much to see my husband only to find out it was all a lie. Tell me, Can you take that gamble Ameera?
[Ameera turned to Crystal and looked at her long and thoughtfully, her brows furrowed and her eyes shone with sorrow and guilt]
Ameera: I'm sorry Crystal, but the cost to me far outweighs the benefits of my constructed wager. I am staying put.
Crystal: You guys don't you get it?! There is no wager! This place is Paradise all that garbage I was spewing earlier was me being angry and nothing more!
Kaitlyn: What you're spewing now is a product of madness and desperation! I will not throw myself upon the hot coals of your curiosity and burn myself for them I won't!
Ameera: Besides Crystal……don't you remember?
Crystal: Remember what Ameera?
Ameera: The Guardian never explicitly told us where we were.
Crystal: What are you even talking about Ameera?
Ameera: When the Guardian was making the rounds and greeting all of us, we never gave him the chance to tell us where we were.
[Kaitlyn thinks back to that moment and suddenly covers her mouth with her hands distraught]
Kaitlyn: Ameera's right……we never did Crystal.
[Crystal looks at the two women stunned. Her face had gone pale at the thought.]
Ameera: I cut him off because of my hubris, you cut him off with your eagerness, and Kaitlyn her excessive formalness. Our worst qualities revealed themselves immediately.
Crystal: No…….
Ameera: He never affirmed or denied this location. Our foolishness led us to allow him to leave while we were still in a state of ignorance. There is nothing for us here Crystal, there no purpose in this place!
Kaitlyn: No purpose at all!
Crystal: I said no! This supposed to be the place where higher purpose is found!
Ameera: This room is nothing more than a symbol of the doubt we have locked ourselves in. There cannot be a higher purpose that spans the whole of eternity.
Crystal: You're lying to me again! I already told you I hate liars Ameera! I hate them!
[Crystal sinks to her knees and puts her hands up to her ears trying to block out all the sounds swirling in her head. Kaitlyn is slumped against the wall crying and Ameera can't bear to look. Crystal then speaks almost seemingly to herself]
Crystal: Where even are we?
[Crystal looks at Kaitlyn and Ameera and with a distraught expression consumed with fear, sadness, and panic, she feverishly rushes towards the door, gazing momentarily at the golden knob whose rubies and emeralds shined with such promise. They glistened with an optimism that spoke to her and said that beyond this room of deceit and emotional impairment, lied happiness, fulfillment, and every other vice of the virtuous. She violently jerks the knob and thrusts open the door, and stares across the other side, her eyes lingering upon the revelation before her. Her face registers nothing until she looks back at Kaitlyn and Ameera. They're engulfed by sadness, the discourse between them and Crystal made them realize that whatever lied behind that door, it was meaningless to them. Crystal looks down and sighs slightly as she weakly shuts the door and stands before it closed to her again.]
Narrator: A door closed to them forever, what lies beyond it is inconsequential, for these women have discovered something of far greater profundity… Purpose is Paradise.